I think I have figured out the earthworm's powers and how they're going to take over the land ... or Ballarat at the very least.
I'm pretty sure that these freakishly long earthworms have the ability to control the flow of time. It's important to bear in mind that this might be a power possessed by all earthworms. Not just the Ballarat ons.
I don't really know how they control the flow of time. I just know that they do control it.
Don't believe me?
Well, you're a fool ... but that being said, I'll explain the process behind the statement so that you don't judge me as a crazy person;
Last night (or this morning) I went to bed a couple of hours before sunrise. Being an insoniac who stupidly didn't do any physical activity to wear myself out, it took me a long time to go to sleep even though I was tired as. I was lying there for at least an hour and a half before I started thinking that I should start hearing that damned rooster crowing and seeing the beginnings of sunrise.
But the rooster never crowed (that's got to be a first), and the sun didn't rise.
I know, I know. You're probably thinking that I drifted off to sleepy land at that point.
Well, I didn't.
I don't go to sleep that easily.
I actually lay there for a long time in the dark, hearing no rooster crow, nor any sign of the beginnings of sunrise.
Somehow the earthworms had slowed the flow of time around me!
I don't know why or how.
Although I suspect they have little miny ray guns that they point towards a target. Nor do I know why they would want to slow down the flow of time, unless it were to speed themselves up for an attack on us ...
Oh!
Maybe they were testing out their time ray guns on me to make sure that there were no ill effects to suffer!
Those bastards!
Even though I know it was built out of hate blinded by fear, I think I need to start working on my own version of a Master Mold to deal with these slimey creepy crawlies. That will send them a very clear message that I'm (by which I mean humanity) not to be trifled with
Showing posts with label Ballarat Earthworm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ballarat Earthworm. Show all posts
Monday, June 13, 2011
Sunday, June 12, 2011
Earthworms
I know I've been banged on in the past about how we should fear the inter-dimensional travelling
bunnies, the squid and the monster under the bed, but I think I may have been wrong about them.
Well, actually, maybe not the inter-dimensional travelling bunnies and the squid; they could still pose a significant threat to us. However, I doubt that the monster under the bed is much of a threat to us.
But anyway ...
All of the above pose a threat to a certain degree. But there's something else that could pose a threat to us; earthworms!
Yeah, that's right. Earthworms. Or more precisely, the earthworms indigenous to the Ballarat area ... I don't actually know if it's just a Ballarat earthworm thing or just an earthworm thing in general. All I know is that the Ballarat earthworms seem to be going against the natural order (although that's how I feel about all earthworms).
I just went outside to throw out some trash, and was greeted by the sight of the largest earthworm I've ever seen. It was massive. Not quite Gippsland earthworm size. But it was up there.
Now some of you might be thinking that I may be over reacting to the sight of the massive earthworm at the front door. But you weren't there! You don't know what it's like. You didn't hear it.
Yeah, I could hear it.
I could hear this weird sound as it moved, trying to escape from sight and hide. It made this weird rattling sound each time it pulled its body along the cement ... and to confirm this I actually stayed and watched and listened to it for a few minutes. I wasn't imagining the sound. It was real!
Once I confirmed I wasn't imagining things, this got me to wondering. Mainly what was the earthworm doing at the front door so far from the dirt it's supposed to call home?
My only conclusion: it was trying to get inside the house! And that it heard me coming to the front door and decided to try and hide.
I don't know why it was trying to get inside the house. I can only assume that it wanted to kill every single living thing inside.
Why would it want to do that?
I don't know.
But I think it's time that people took the earthworm threat seriously ... especially so for the good people of Ballarat; the earthworms in Ballarat are definitely larger than your average, and actually makes an audible noise.
It's time people did something about these unnatural beings, just like Senater Kelly and Warren Worthington when they felt threatened by the mutants. I'm not suggesting that we build an AI unit like Master Mold (two simple reasons for that; building AI always backfires when the unit gets smart enough and Master Mold destroyed humanity in its bid to destroy the mutants).
But it's only a matter of time before the earthworms rise en mass and take Ballarat for themselves. Something needs to be done, and soon, or else Ballarat (and quite possibly the rest of Australia) will become the new domain of the earthworm.
bunnies, the squid and the monster under the bed, but I think I may have been wrong about them.
Well, actually, maybe not the inter-dimensional travelling bunnies and the squid; they could still pose a significant threat to us. However, I doubt that the monster under the bed is much of a threat to us.
But anyway ...
All of the above pose a threat to a certain degree. But there's something else that could pose a threat to us; earthworms!
Yeah, that's right. Earthworms. Or more precisely, the earthworms indigenous to the Ballarat area ... I don't actually know if it's just a Ballarat earthworm thing or just an earthworm thing in general. All I know is that the Ballarat earthworms seem to be going against the natural order (although that's how I feel about all earthworms).
I just went outside to throw out some trash, and was greeted by the sight of the largest earthworm I've ever seen. It was massive. Not quite Gippsland earthworm size. But it was up there.
Now some of you might be thinking that I may be over reacting to the sight of the massive earthworm at the front door. But you weren't there! You don't know what it's like. You didn't hear it.
Yeah, I could hear it.
I could hear this weird sound as it moved, trying to escape from sight and hide. It made this weird rattling sound each time it pulled its body along the cement ... and to confirm this I actually stayed and watched and listened to it for a few minutes. I wasn't imagining the sound. It was real!
Once I confirmed I wasn't imagining things, this got me to wondering. Mainly what was the earthworm doing at the front door so far from the dirt it's supposed to call home?
My only conclusion: it was trying to get inside the house! And that it heard me coming to the front door and decided to try and hide.
I don't know why it was trying to get inside the house. I can only assume that it wanted to kill every single living thing inside.
Why would it want to do that?
I don't know.
But I think it's time that people took the earthworm threat seriously ... especially so for the good people of Ballarat; the earthworms in Ballarat are definitely larger than your average, and actually makes an audible noise.
It's time people did something about these unnatural beings, just like Senater Kelly and Warren Worthington when they felt threatened by the mutants. I'm not suggesting that we build an AI unit like Master Mold (two simple reasons for that; building AI always backfires when the unit gets smart enough and Master Mold destroyed humanity in its bid to destroy the mutants).
But it's only a matter of time before the earthworms rise en mass and take Ballarat for themselves. Something needs to be done, and soon, or else Ballarat (and quite possibly the rest of Australia) will become the new domain of the earthworm.
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