In sign that zombie movies are quite possibly the most popular movie genre ever created, some wise guy in America has decided to create a zombie test to test just how well people would survive in an actual zombie apocalypse.
Sounds like a good idea, full of fun and exciting times for the contestants, right?
Sure it's fun. It'll be a real laugh for everyone, until the first brain hungry zombie appears and attacks the first victim. Then maybe the whole zombie course thing might not be so much fun for the contestants.
You see, despite my best efforts, I haven't been able to determine if the zombies in this obstacle course are real or not. By the way organisers were talking about the zombies, I'm inclined to think that they are in fact real bona fide zombies.
I really can't see anything fun or exciting (well, ok, I'll give them excitement. Even if it is the wrong kind of excitement) about running for my life from a horde of ravenous brain eating zombies. Especially if I had been under the impression that the zombies weren't real right up until the first killing.
Really can't see the fun times there.
I mean, if was guaranteed that the zombies weren't real, then it would be a huge amount of fun to run around the obstacle course playing Zombie Apocalypse. But only if the zombies are paid actors with make up on.
But what's even more worrying than this (yes, there's actually something more worrying than people willingly signing themselves up to be chased by zombies [truth inadvertising]) is that if the zombies are in fact the real thing, then that means that parts of America (at the very least) have hordes of zombies running around, attacking people for their brains.
Why hasn't this been covered by the media? This has "headline news!" written all over it.
Showing posts with label Zombie. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Zombie. Show all posts
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
The Apocalypse Free Weekend
Saturday 21st May 2011
1:15pm
So apparently I shouldn’t think about things that scare me when I’m tired and susceptible to the workings of my active imagination.
Last night after talking about the Zombie Apocalypse (which still hasn’t happened) and mum’s scary geese that used to chase me, I had dreams filled with apocalyptic zombie geese.
Really not all that cool.
But what’s worse is that the couple of times I woke up, I was just that paranoid that every breath of wind outside sounded like a ghost or something was out to get me … I don’t know why I thought ghosts when it was the apocalyptic zombie geese filling my dreams, but there you go.
I was grateful to wake up this morning and find myself perfectly unattacked by those damn zombies, though. Less grateful about the fact that the Zombie Apocalypse made me so uneasy in the first place. I mean, the whole thing really is just taking the piss out of the crazy fundamentalists. So it really shouldn’t be giving me bad dreams or anything.
And I must also point out that at this time it doesn’t look like the Zombie Apocalypse is going to happen. I mean I haven’t left the house yet or even turned on the TV to watch the news or anything. But I can hear plenty of cars driving around, and zombie lore seems to state that zombies cannot drive. So that and the fact that mum’s neighbours sounded alive and healthy and definitely unzombie like, leads me to believe there is no imminent danger from the Zombie Apocalypse.
But who knows?
It might actually rely upon the soulless bodies of the raptured. So I guess if the rapture hasn’t happened yet, then of course there wouldn’t be any zombies running around … although mum’s neighbours are good little Catholics, and they’re still unraptured. So maybe the fundamentalists got the apocalypse dates wrong … or it’s just not going to happen.
Really can’t say I’m all that surprised about the whole thing really.
This is like the fourth supposed apocalypse in my life time. I’m sure I’m going to live through plenty more.
3:53pm
Well, after that little trip down the street, I’m happy to say that there’s no zombies running around, attacking people. But at the same time, it was eerily quiet down there. The only other times I have seen it so empty is during the Grand Final match in September.
It would appear that while people were in fact raptured, their soulless bodies haven’t been left behind to become zombies.
No Zombie Apocalypse for us.
Probably a good thing considering my complete lack of weaponry here at mum’s. if I’m going to have to face a Zombie Apocalypse, I’d like to do so at dad’s; he at least has some guns and a couple of fantastic zombie proof hiding places I can lay low in for awhile … zombies can’t climb trees can they?
9:53pm
After dinner and drinks at Pippa’s, I can safely report that continued complete lack of Zombie Apocalypse.
I’m pretty certain that there hasn’t even been any kind of rapture event … although that might just be our family; turns out that no one is particularly Christian in the family. Not even Pippa, which surprises me, because she’s all about keeping up appearances … and being a church going Christian would be the perfect way to keep up appearances … I must say that I’m impressed that she’s not Christian.
But there have been other signs of the lack of a rapture event. The most obvious being the lack of empty clothes just lying around everywhere. I’m pretty sure that the council isn’t as competent enough to clean up all of the clothes on the sly without any kind of sign.
Even if the Geelong City Council is competent enough to hide away the clothes of the raptured without anyone noticing, they wouldn’t be able to hide all of the naked bodies floating up towards heaven.
Pretty sure that little spectacle would’ve been noted by at least one person.
So it’s looking like that May 21st 2011 is, in fact, not the end of the world.
Take that, you stupid Christian fundamentalists! Proven wrong once again.
Sunday 22 May 2011
2:33pm
Good news!
I now have a pair of weather appropriate shoes to wear this winter. Thanks to mum and her wonderful birthday gift giving generosity, I now have a pair of brogues (or something along those lines) that won’t soak my feet at the tiniest sign of wet weather.
Huzzah!
Although, on the down side, I can’t wear them when I’m running, since they’re distinctly not running shoes. So I’m still going to have to wear the Volley’s when I run. Even in wet weather.
Blurgh!
But whatever. I guess it’s all good practise for when I eventually join the army.
3:33pm
Damn Megan! Damn her to hell!
Well, actually damning her to hell might be a little drastic. Especially given that I’m not all that annoyed with her … actually not annoyed at her. Just annoyed at what she pointed out.
In the last few years I’ve noticed that I’ve started to stutter a little. It’s especially noticeable when I’m drinking. But I’ve always thought it was in my head, the stutter, so never really gave it much thought.
But the other night Megan called me out on it before we went to mum’s birthday dinner.
I have a stutter noticeable enough for others to call me out on it!
And I don’t even know why I started stuttering in recent years. It’s not like I’m all that highly strung or anything. And it has never been a problem in the past.
So I have no idea what the hell it’s about.
But it’s definitely something I’m going to have to work on.
1:15pm
So apparently I shouldn’t think about things that scare me when I’m tired and susceptible to the workings of my active imagination.
Last night after talking about the Zombie Apocalypse (which still hasn’t happened) and mum’s scary geese that used to chase me, I had dreams filled with apocalyptic zombie geese.
Really not all that cool.
But what’s worse is that the couple of times I woke up, I was just that paranoid that every breath of wind outside sounded like a ghost or something was out to get me … I don’t know why I thought ghosts when it was the apocalyptic zombie geese filling my dreams, but there you go.
I was grateful to wake up this morning and find myself perfectly unattacked by those damn zombies, though. Less grateful about the fact that the Zombie Apocalypse made me so uneasy in the first place. I mean, the whole thing really is just taking the piss out of the crazy fundamentalists. So it really shouldn’t be giving me bad dreams or anything.
And I must also point out that at this time it doesn’t look like the Zombie Apocalypse is going to happen. I mean I haven’t left the house yet or even turned on the TV to watch the news or anything. But I can hear plenty of cars driving around, and zombie lore seems to state that zombies cannot drive. So that and the fact that mum’s neighbours sounded alive and healthy and definitely unzombie like, leads me to believe there is no imminent danger from the Zombie Apocalypse.
But who knows?
It might actually rely upon the soulless bodies of the raptured. So I guess if the rapture hasn’t happened yet, then of course there wouldn’t be any zombies running around … although mum’s neighbours are good little Catholics, and they’re still unraptured. So maybe the fundamentalists got the apocalypse dates wrong … or it’s just not going to happen.
Really can’t say I’m all that surprised about the whole thing really.
This is like the fourth supposed apocalypse in my life time. I’m sure I’m going to live through plenty more.
3:53pm
Well, after that little trip down the street, I’m happy to say that there’s no zombies running around, attacking people. But at the same time, it was eerily quiet down there. The only other times I have seen it so empty is during the Grand Final match in September.
It would appear that while people were in fact raptured, their soulless bodies haven’t been left behind to become zombies.
No Zombie Apocalypse for us.
Probably a good thing considering my complete lack of weaponry here at mum’s. if I’m going to have to face a Zombie Apocalypse, I’d like to do so at dad’s; he at least has some guns and a couple of fantastic zombie proof hiding places I can lay low in for awhile … zombies can’t climb trees can they?
9:53pm
After dinner and drinks at Pippa’s, I can safely report that continued complete lack of Zombie Apocalypse.
I’m pretty certain that there hasn’t even been any kind of rapture event … although that might just be our family; turns out that no one is particularly Christian in the family. Not even Pippa, which surprises me, because she’s all about keeping up appearances … and being a church going Christian would be the perfect way to keep up appearances … I must say that I’m impressed that she’s not Christian.
But there have been other signs of the lack of a rapture event. The most obvious being the lack of empty clothes just lying around everywhere. I’m pretty sure that the council isn’t as competent enough to clean up all of the clothes on the sly without any kind of sign.
Even if the Geelong City Council is competent enough to hide away the clothes of the raptured without anyone noticing, they wouldn’t be able to hide all of the naked bodies floating up towards heaven.
Pretty sure that little spectacle would’ve been noted by at least one person.
So it’s looking like that May 21st 2011 is, in fact, not the end of the world.
Take that, you stupid Christian fundamentalists! Proven wrong once again.
Sunday 22 May 2011
2:33pm
Good news!
I now have a pair of weather appropriate shoes to wear this winter. Thanks to mum and her wonderful birthday gift giving generosity, I now have a pair of brogues (or something along those lines) that won’t soak my feet at the tiniest sign of wet weather.
Huzzah!
Although, on the down side, I can’t wear them when I’m running, since they’re distinctly not running shoes. So I’m still going to have to wear the Volley’s when I run. Even in wet weather.
Blurgh!
But whatever. I guess it’s all good practise for when I eventually join the army.
3:33pm
Damn Megan! Damn her to hell!
Well, actually damning her to hell might be a little drastic. Especially given that I’m not all that annoyed with her … actually not annoyed at her. Just annoyed at what she pointed out.
In the last few years I’ve noticed that I’ve started to stutter a little. It’s especially noticeable when I’m drinking. But I’ve always thought it was in my head, the stutter, so never really gave it much thought.
But the other night Megan called me out on it before we went to mum’s birthday dinner.
I have a stutter noticeable enough for others to call me out on it!
And I don’t even know why I started stuttering in recent years. It’s not like I’m all that highly strung or anything. And it has never been a problem in the past.
So I have no idea what the hell it’s about.
But it’s definitely something I’m going to have to work on.
Friday, May 20, 2011
The Zombie Apocalypse
Ok, so I've been thinking about about the possible upcoming Zombie Apocalypse, and I have a question; Where the hell did the zombies come from?!
All of the fundamentalist Christians who believe the end of the world is so nigh that it's tomorrow all believe that they will be raptured and saved from the shit storm that will be taking place on earth.
That's simple enough to understand. That's basically what every self respecting Christain believes what will take place when the rapture happens.
But some of the crazy fundamentalists seem to also think that there will be a Zombie Apocalypse, which everyone on Twitter has latched onto for shits and giggles.
As I have already asked, where the hell did these zombies of the apocalypse come from?
Are they the souless bodies of the raptured? Is it some sick and twisted joke of the Devil's. Or is it just Jesus being petty and punishing all of the non believers further before the Devil makes his appearance?
It's just that the Zombie Apocalypse comes from nowhere, and has nothing to get the zombie ball rolling.
All of the fundamentalist Christians who believe the end of the world is so nigh that it's tomorrow all believe that they will be raptured and saved from the shit storm that will be taking place on earth.
That's simple enough to understand. That's basically what every self respecting Christain believes what will take place when the rapture happens.
But some of the crazy fundamentalists seem to also think that there will be a Zombie Apocalypse, which everyone on Twitter has latched onto for shits and giggles.
As I have already asked, where the hell did these zombies of the apocalypse come from?
Are they the souless bodies of the raptured? Is it some sick and twisted joke of the Devil's. Or is it just Jesus being petty and punishing all of the non believers further before the Devil makes his appearance?
It's just that the Zombie Apocalypse comes from nowhere, and has nothing to get the zombie ball rolling.
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