How To Make Sure That the Tourists Don't Bother You

It's summer time, which means it's turo season.

Anyone who lives in a tourist hotspot will know just how annoying turos are, and wants nothing more for them to "piss off back home!"

That solution would make everyone much, much happier. But it's a well known fact that turos are selfish, inconsiderate bastards who are stupid beyond belief. So they're not going to make everyone's life easier by going back home. They're going to make everyone's life as miserable as possible and remain as turos for as long as possible.

So that leaves everyone else with the choice of putting up with the crowds of turos or becoming a hermit for the tourist season or packing up and going somewhere else and become a turo themselves.

Not the best choices.

But there's a way to fight back against the turos.

Actually there's a number of ways to fight back against them. Unfortunately, though, the most satisfying ways (like seeing who can get the most points mowing them down in the car) are a little bit illegal and will most likely land you in jail. And if you end up in jail the turo has won.

The best way to fight the turo while not breaking the law is by not showering and becoming very pungent. You can even take it a step further and put on some make up

that makes you look even more feral than you smell, and if you can blacken a couple of teeth you'd look very frightening to the turo, who'd make sure to get out of your way when you go out to do your day to day activities.

Imagine that; being able to walk around unhindered by turos in the height of tourist season! That's a win for you, the local.

And if you walk around carrying an empty beer can (since you'd get in trouble with a full can of beer), and talk like a loud ladette/ocka, you probably will only see the back of the turos when you're out.

However, there is one little drawback to this; your friends will probably won't want anything to do with you while you're being a smelly feral local.

But this is where the plan gets even better;

One smelly, feral local is good and all. But that won't really keep the turos away. They'll just be avoiding you. If you get all of your friends and family to do the same as you, and walk around in large, loud groups the turo should hopefully be scared away from ever visiting the town after a couple of seasons of this. And if the teenagers are given the summer job of hanging around in large groups near the turos faveorite places the turos will be scared away even faster, because we all know that the scariest thing in the world is a large, obnoxious group of teenagers.

Odour Neutralising Dish Washing Liquid

Washing the dishes today, I couldn't help reading the label on the dishwashing liquid. I don't know why I haven't read it before. I have done the dishes plenty of times since this particular bottle was purchased.

But one of Morning Fresh's cleaning wonders is that it neutralises odours.

This might just be me. I don't actually know what others think when it comes to dishes and keeping them clean. But if the dishes still have a smelly odour after I've cleaned them, then I clearly haven't done that great a job cleaning them, because they're still not dirty.

Although, maybe the odour isn't coming from the suspicious pile of dishes that may or may not be clean. Maybe the odour is coming elsewhere from the house. Maybe the power of Morning Fresh's odour neuteraliser is so strong that it completely rids the house of all odours. Even the smell of the dirty kitty litter tray (but that's what the odour neuturalising kitty litter is for).

Then there's the question of why would you do the dishes to get rid of the smell instead of locating and removing the source of the smell;

"Hmmm, something smell kind of very funky. Getting rid of the smell is just too much work, so I'll do the dishes instead. That'll get rid of the bad smell!"

If I had've realised that the dishwashing liquid I was buying contained odour neutralising powers I wouldn't have bought it. I would've brought a brand not Morning Fresh that didn't have stupid claims

But then, the only reason why I bought was because I was just curious as to what Sparkling Fresh smells like (lavender), and if buying a strange new purple product only ends badly if it contains alcohol (yes, it does).

So until Morning Fresh stop making stupid, irrational claims about odour neutralising powers, they can kiss my business goodbye.